COUGAR VACATION

I know, another one, huh? I'm sure my life sounds pretty tough from where you're sitting.

After school lets out tomorrow I will gather my snacks and parcels and be off to board a train with the illustrious Dan. We'll be traveling to Gansu (that's the pale blue barbell-shaped province in the North) on a volunteer trip organized by the Yale Book Club. Once there we will donate books to local libraries, spend our nights in a village homestay, teach at local elementary schools (using curriculum which, according to the information I received, is best concluded by the foreign teacher leading the children in song), and quite possibly watch dinner be slaughtered before our very eyes.

After a few days in the village, Dan, myself, and a few of the other volunteers will try to visit some nearby Tibetan monasteries. We're not sure if that's going to happen. From there, we will take a train to Urumchi, the capital of Xinjiang (the big brown province in the Northwestern-most corner), a historically vital stop on the Silk Road, and the current home of my Central Eurasian Linguist pal Eric. I haven't been this excited about a trip in years.

Will I post pictures upon my return? Indeed I will! But after that I plan to take a month-long break from blogging in order to concentrate on personal correspondence and general sanity maintenance.

It has actually been a good week, and not just because of the receipt of the universe-destroying, men's pocky containing goodness of John's and Montana's care package, or because of the frankly awesome presentation I gave in class today about how China's classification of its minority peoples was based on the Stalin-authored Soviet classification system (it's a long story). No, I am feeling good because I am finally seeing some of the language skills that I had long ago expected I would have by now. Results! Learning this language is a loooooong process, as everyone keeps reminding me, but it seems that there is so much riding on this and I am starting to lack patience.

Think of something you really like to do, but aren't necessarily very good at; something which requires patience, skills, a large time investment, and the better part of a lifetime to master; perhaps chess? the cello? building a sea monkey empire?

Now imagine pinning your hopes, dreams, and entire future on being able to do this thing and then you will understand why I need a nice long vacation, which I will relish no matter how much sing-a-longing and Yak milking it may involve.

YANGZHOU: DAY 2

Our second day in Yangzhou involved less time spent on the tour buses and more spent playing around. Good thing too, as a fair few of my classmates were nursing hangovers, if not from alcohol than from nearly ingesting poop.

Our first stop was the Wudaotai Mansion (误道台宅第), a sprawling, walled-in residence many centuries old. Our group, having already had its numbers by those who had decided to sleep in and explore the city on their own, evidenced even less interest than the day before in the barking tour guide, and more interest in looking at whatever caught their eye, regardless of its cultural or historical relevance. Personally, I rather liked the goldfish pond,

an altar to my girl Kuan Yin:

and all the wall hanging composed of slabs of rock with patterns that resembled Chinese landscape paintings:

My classmates continued on their campaign to terrorize Chinese children,

and the teachers continued their campaign of posing cutely.

After a reasonably good lunch of local specialties we were delivered to the He Garden (何园) and given a couple of hours to roam around and enjoy the flowers, the rocks, and all the strange little doorways, dead-ends, and corridors.

My classmate Ryan doing some sort of rock climbing/yoga hybrid. He actually hung out like that for a while.

Later, as a few of us were resting on some rocks and chatting about socialist states, a young girl and her grandfather passed by, the grandfather indicating us and explaining: "Those people are foreigners; everything they say we can't understand, everything we say they can't understand." We were all so stunned at the lesson of the futility cross-cultural communication that none of us had a chance to correct him.

Graffiti etched into bamboo:

During the last part of the day we were unleashed into the center of the city, modern in most every way, save for some ancient pagodas in the middle of traffic circles and these tranquil old canals.

I joined a few similarly aimless classmates for some urban explorations. I remember we discussed finding a snack street that we had heard about, and that the possibility of getting neck massages/head washes was raised, but all other options were nixed once when we found the local amusement park/arcade.

I sucked at everything but air hockey but enjoyed watching the boys draw crowds around them as they played the tyco drums or shoot-em-ups. My classmate Chris pointed out this little boy standing on top of a basketball game, while his grandfather shot baskets from the side, noting that it summed up a whole lot about modern-day China.

Outside the arcade there were some really cool activities for kids, including this inflatable floating gerbil wheel:

and these miniature paddle boats:

It was with much gleeful excitement that I spotted yet another game of bumper cars near the carousel. There were four of us, Chris, Ryan, Ned and myself, and we each got our own car, aiming for nothing less than total 碰碰车domination.

I performed pretty well, having done some warming-up the day before, but the most impressive crash of the day came when a car containing two little Chinese girls aged about 7 and 5 rear-ended me with a dramatic jolt that caused my ass to leave my seat for a few brief seconds. The crowd of curious onlookers, bored parents, and people waiting in line was quite obviously delighted by the spectacle.

YANGZHOU: DAY 1

Last weekend was IUP's Spring semester field trip to Yangzhou in Jiangsu Province. As with last semester's trip to Xi'an, we took overnight trains in both directions, spending just one night in town. Our group of roughly 70 students, teachers, administrators and assorted companions dominated a train carriage filled with merriment, mockery and the generous sharing of snacks and drinks.

Views from the train heading south:

Morning on the train. Bunks are in rooms to the left and there are fold-out seats and little tables in this narrow aisle, through which carts of snacks and drinks intermittently pass.

Arriving in the morning our group was divided between two tour buses and deposited at this tourist site, Ge Garden (个园), a place apparently under the guidance of the "Jiangsu Provincial Steering Committee For Ideological and Ethical Advancement. Thank goodness.

One of the most famous ancient gardens in China, the place was absolutely packed and thus not particularly relaxing. The presence of our megaphone wielding tour guide made it even less so. These pictures give some idea of the crowds.

This was a cool little shrub with branches tied in dozens of loose knots. I never figured out the exact meaning, but I'm sure there was something mighty auspicious about it.

I mostly gave up on photographing unmolested scenery and instead took pictures of the people, including my cheese-loving classmates.

From Ge Garden we exited into a maze of hutongs filled with rickshaws and old men.

I think they liked us.

Eventually we arrived at this vast old dwelling, the name and significance of which I never got around to learning. Happily it was almost empty and we were allowed to wander around at will through dusty old bedrooms, leafy courtyards, and ancient corridors. To no one's surprise, it turns out the elites have always lived well.

Our next stop in Yangzhou was to the famed Slim West Lake (瘦西湖), apparently a popular tourist destination since the 3rd century A.D. The lake was long and noodle-y and very pretty, though admittedly thronged with people. There were bridges, boats, pavillions, and gardens, but my favorite part was the Cherry Blossoms. They made me think of home.

Escaping the crowds on the shore, Ding Ding and I wandered up the hill and were confronted with this surprising sight:

I demanded that we investigate.

It turned out to be a small amusement park with the above "crescent moon flyers", and other assorted kiddie rides, including go-carts driven by speed-crazed little emperors:

and these surprisingly good bumper cars (碰碰车, or 'bump bump car'):

5RMB (about 70 cents) bought us each our own car, and it as soon as it was over I was totally ready to do it again. Unfortunately we had to get back to the group.

On the way back towards the lake, we passed some performers in traditional Peking Opera garb. This old woman smiled at me sweetly and waved hello with an elegant swoosh of her long sleeves.

Leslie in a patch of purple flowers:

At the south end of the lake:

I skipped out on the last sight of the day and checked into the hotel early. The room I shared with one of the teachers was surprisingly deluxe, with brocade linens, mini-bar, and a dining room table and chairs. The bathroom had the usual freebies along with a basket of, erm, special products, including this package of "Senior Woman Trousers":

There were also several lotions and potions with hilarious English translations that I really wanted to take as souvenirs, but since they were 10RMB each and our rooms had already been paid for by IUP, I feared the eventuality of checking out and boarding the bus, only to have the teacher in charge of the trip demand I pay for the ox-head phallic stimulants I had removed from the room.

I joined a dozen or so other students for dinner at a local restaurant serving local cuisine but skipped out on the clubbing that went down afterwards. In the morning I discovered what a good decision this was after hearing from my classmates that one of the establishments had delivered to their table a number of glasses, one of which had feces on it. Yes, actual feces. The club staff agreed it was such, but provided no refund or remuneration. Incredibly, my classmates remained at this bar another hour or so and finished their round of drinks.

Perhaps some people through they might as well get some use out of all those Hepatitis vaccinations we all endured... or maybe all this studying is finally just getting to us.